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She’s so experienced, can I trust her?: Romance : Nigerialog.com - Nigeria's Premier Online Forum

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She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: dayan (M) |Time : February 21, 2019, 12:41:18 AM
Dear Bunmi,

About nine months ago, I started dating my boss’s niece. She’s a beautiful, intelligent woman who’s highly respected among her peers and colleagues, but she does have a reputation for sleeping around.

She’s never made a secret of the fact that she’s slept with several of her colleagues and I’ve heard a few are jealous she chose me.   I love her and she says she loves me and only has eyes for me, but I can’t shake the feelings that she might go back to her old ways.

love1.jpg

Caleb, by e-mail.

Dear Caleb,

I suppose you don’t have history of your own at all? It would be much more unusual to meet a woman with no previous sexual partners, so give the woman a break, will you?

Concentrate on the fact that she’s happy with you and you alone. If she enjoyed her previous life so much, she wouldn’t now be with you, would she?

One thing that will surely jeopardise what you have is your getting all paranoid about what she’s doing when she’s not with you.

Here’s another way to look at it: your girlfriend has sampled some of the male goods on offer, and now she obviously feels, from an informed perspective, that you are the best of the crop! So, don’t worry. Trust, you’re on to a winner.

Source

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: dayan (M) |Time : February 21, 2019, 12:42:55 AM
I will comment on this later because I have a lot to say on this.
Stay tuned and FOLLOW this page to read my soon coming comment!  8)

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: dayan (M) |Time : February 21, 2019, 09:09:06 AM
Okay, here we go!
Can he trust her?

This is a neither here nor there kind of question whereby the danger or "threat" possibilities the man faces depend on many things:

(a) The man's own preference in women:
Some men still prefer experienced women even if they are threatened by it; they like the competition that comes with it. While others prefer virgins even if they themselves are male prostitutes. It all depends! Most men prefer somewhat reserved women, at least for the peace of mind that comes with that. The man in the story got attracted to the lady in the story though he knew about her past. He may have even been attracted to her BECAUSE of her past, though he now wants her to stop.

(b) The man's own personal experience with women:
Nothing beats experience because the man would have "been there and done that" and therefore "there is nothing new under the sun" to him. 
The story didn't say whether the man is experienced, but it clearly shows that the man is insecure in the relationship. 

(c) The man's level of self confidence in his personal ability to "keep up" with this woman:
This is self explanatory.  A man's confidence is not always firmly tethered to his financial or physical endowment. Some men are just confident no matter their endowments.
Naturally though, the more endowed a man is, the more confident he tends to get, but I digress...
Some men are too jealous naturally, and that deals a serious blow to self confidence.
Women are weird creatures, and can sense a man's confidence from miles away. Women prefer, and reserve themselves more for, men of high self confidence.
Women tend to cheat more on men of lower confidence than men of higher confidence, all things being equal (ie assuming that endowment is not a factor). Though these days women do "revenge cheating", but still, they have more respect for men of higher self confidence.

I personally think that every wise man should learn to control his fears about his woman straying.
Sometimes she wound NEVER cheat when you throw her out there and let her go anywhere and do everything, but the moment you want to start paying attention to her activities, she suddenly cheats! Weird, but it happens!
So, let her be; she would wonder why you let her be and start looking at you more with respect. While she is looking at you, she won't have time for other guys. This, of course depends on whether the woman is a normal woman and not a whore. Whores are totally different sets of animals!

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: Ramjoe (M) |Time : February 21, 2019, 10:38:59 AM
Quote

She’s never made a secret of the fact that she’s slept with several of her colleagues and I’ve heard a few are jealous she chose me.   I love her and she says she loves me and only has eyes for me, but I can’t shake the feelings that she might go back to her old ways.


No doubt, this guy is in love. However, he might destroy the whole thing if his insecurity gets the better of him somehow.

His fear can prevent him from enjoying the "peace" that comes with being with a woman and make him see only things to be scared of. That way, he will forget a lot of good stuff and dwell on the "seemingly" bad ones which might eventually be products of his imagination more than they are real.

Go, live, love and don't gossip - don't pay attention to rumours (for example: avoid places where you heard some guys are jealous, beat it) just go with the flow; you love her, she loves you - and you chose each other - just deliberately choose to be positive about the whole thing and see where that takes you.

One of the biggest problems with relationships is "trying to see too far ahead" by losing sight of the present. If it will work, you can't categorically say but if you continue to be paranoid and this insecurity overwhelms you - there's a higher chance it won't.

Be happy, you have a babe you love! Try everyday to live and love!

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: alagbe003 (M) |Time : February 21, 2019, 06:00:02 PM
Men are more jealous than women.. Fear has crumbled a lot of relationship.. Do not assume, don't judge a book by it's cover. Better to be in a relationship with peace of mind, women don't like guys who give them close marking, let her live her life.

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: Ramjoe (M) |Time : February 22, 2019, 09:42:28 AM
Men are more jealous than women.. Fear has crumbled a lot of relationship.. Do not assume, don't judge a book by it's cover. Better to be in a relationship with peace of mind, women don't like guys who give them close marking, let her live her life.

Hehehehe  :)) :))

"close marking" got me grinning... Bro, you have a way with words.

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: dayan (M) |Time : February 22, 2019, 07:57:32 PM
Hehehehe  :)) :))

"close marking" got me grinning... Bro, you have a way with words.


The guy must be a footballer wallahi.  :))
In fact I think he plays defence!  8)
Oga Alagbe abi no be so?

Re: She’s so experienced, can I trust her?

By: Ramjoe (M) |Time : February 23, 2019, 06:55:12 AM
The guy must be a footballer wallahi.  :))
In fact I think he plays defence!  8)
Oga Alagbe abi no be so?

Now Alagbe, what's your "defence"?

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