Have heard a message that discuss about attractions. Am strongly against those that use to say physical attractions doesn't determine in marrying someone. If you marry someone you are not attracted to physically you will keep complaining and correcting for the rest of your life, you might be thinking you can blend him or her up to yout taste. Mind you, you can't change anybody into your our own style except they are already what you want. Have seen some people that they can't identify themself with their man.. Why? They are not satisfied with the physical appearance and yet they are in relationship together. Attractions is highly very important in relationship but not until you get someone that is flashy.......
Physical attraction is good and can make two individuals get married... Emotional, spiritual and behavioural attraction are better and should be more emphasised before deciding to choose or pursue that partner... If both partners are ugly but each one notices kindness, humility etc in the other person,..the love and passion they have for each other will be strong and maintained throughout marriage even when looks and physical attraction have fade away.
As a matter of fact, the second man in the story I mentioned above has exactly this problem!The wife would never walk with him in public occasions and events. She dresses well and walks ahead of her husband. lol
Hmm, much as I would like to agree with you, honestly I can't. A lady youth corper who was not so good looking, but had a boyfriend who was equally not so good looking ended up cheating (and even dumping) her boyfriend for another guy. The two "ugly couples" (lol, for lack of a better word) were so close in the camp, but towards the end of the camping period, this "handsome" guy toasted the "ugly" lady, and she fell BIG TIME for this guy. She simply left her guy and followed this new guy to his own place of primary assignment. She did not look back whatsoever. Now, imagine if they had married each other? The point I make here is that attraction is different from looks, but needs to be there for the heart to keep beating.You know that you have passion for the other person if your heart beats fast at the mere thought of that person being with another person. It is a simple test. Kindness, humility, and any other "goodness" don't cut it for passion. Those come in handy only after passion had taken its prime position. When you couple passion with goodness, you get BLISS. Some couples have it; others don't.
You have opened the two sides wide.... Look is physical and passion is an abstract, that two have to be balanced.If you neglect one and go for the other, my friend you are still gonna come back and look for it.
Actually both are physical. That is why I gave the example of heartbeat. A woman may be dying for this "ugly" guy and follow him to hell and back, and people (who are usually clueless) would be wondering "what does she see in this guy?" But what they don't know is what happens when the two meet behind closed doors. The critics don't see the chemistry behind closed doors, which fuels the passion. So, it is just what it is -> attraction, hence -passion. Passion is a derivative of attraction -you can't really separate the two in this context.
Dayan, I don’t like the advice you gave at the last paragraph. It is in the nature of women to give cold shoulders before they finally agrees, in that case they will not look cheap. I think that courtship should be instituted back in the culture for example: Both parties have to live together at least for 3 months before the actual marriage to see if the are really compatible in all ramifications . I know that this method may be abused by some Casanova but it is worth giving it a try.