img Nigerialog.com - Nigeria's Premier Online Forum - Dear Bumni: My wife needs to accept this second wife
Welcome, Guest.
Did you miss your activation email?

Date: November 14, 2018, 02:50:45 PM

Contact
imgimgimg

Dear Bumni: My wife needs to accept this second wife: Family : Nigerialog.com - Nigeria's Premier Online Forum

95 views

Dear Bumni: My wife needs to accept this second wife

By: dayan (M) |Time : September 11, 2018, 09:05:48 PM
Dear Bunmi,

I AM seemingly happily married with three kids though I have two other children through an affair I had during the course of my marriage. I am in my forties and early this year, we got a maid who wanted to live with us so she could send herself to a hairdressmg school. She is not a raw illiterate and has her SS3 certificate.

I’ve lusted after her since she came to the house and it was inevitable that we became lovers. What started as a fling with me has become an obsession. I’m hooked on our lovemaking.

She has a fantastic body and makes me feel young again. Unfortunately, my wife found out about us and sent her away.


love1-.jpg


I have since found her a one-bedroom flat and she’s now going for a hairdressing course. I’ve always told my wife that as a Muslim, I might marry a second wife. I intend to make this girl just that but my wife is now hollering that I intend to marry a maid she brought to the house. She’s just trying to trivialise the relationship. I can’t give her up. I only want to know how to go about making peace with my wife.

Taofik,


by e-mail.








Dear Taofik,

You obviously understand your wife’s objection to your taking a former maid as a wife. Since you’ve always made it clear that you might take a second wife and she didn’t object, she didn’t bargain for you falling for a maid she brought into the home. She would have wished your prospective second wife be a total stranger.

After saying that, it is obvious that you love this girl and have invested heavily in her. You need to give your wife time to get to terms with your choice of a second wife. It might take her a long time to do that, but you’ll have to keep on showing her the affection and respect she deserves until she comes round, if ever.


Source

Re: Dear Bumni: My wife needs to accept this second wife

By: dayan (M) |Time : September 11, 2018, 09:08:07 PM
Quote
I AM seemingly happily married with three kids though I have two other children through an affair I had during the course of my marriage.

By embarking on illicit sexual activity during your marriage, you lost the moral grounds to start asking for a second wife, IMHO.

Having said that ...

Re: Dear Bumni: My wife needs to accept this second wife

By: dayan (M) |Time : September 11, 2018, 09:16:04 PM
Quote
I’ve always told my wife that as a Muslim, I might marry a second wife. I intend to make this girl just that but my wife is now hollering that I intend to marry a maid she brought to the house.

It is GOOD that you want to marry this girl because you already fathered TWO of her kids.
You wronged your wife by going behind her back to father these children, but an amend has to be made, and marrying that girl is an acceptable amendment.
But that doesn't mean that you should not prep yourself for a hellish family now, because you have -by your actions- fetched ant infested firewood. So be ready for lizards when they come visiting in large numbers!

Note: I am always biased towards children' interests in things like this. Had it been that you didn't have these kids, I would have advised you to cease and desist from committing adultery and cheating on your wife. That horse has since bolted from the barns...
so, the kids first now!
Muslim or not, if you want to marry a second wife, your first wife has to agree first, again, IMHO.

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. Reply

web site traffic statistics